Sunday, April 22, 2012

Peak Week!

This post originally started out as a timeline journal... And then it turned into a rant. And it is kind of a rant, but its really just me being carb depleted/hungry/sore/exhausted, bitchy AND sick. ;)  Also kind of a hodgepodge of what's going on and questions I have for any and all that want to answer!

I'm getting really damn clumsy about now. Carb depleted + zoning out at work = papercut on my eye, knocking over coffees, etc.
I got really sick on Tuesday. At first I thought maybe I was breaking a threshold... I threw up all over my office. In front of my boss who already loves the fact that I do this, no less (note sarcasm), and during a teleconference I started vomiting fish & asparagus. Lovely. Consequently, I bloated big time. Throwing up apparently made my body hold absolutely every molecule of water and my mind freak the hell out. A few days of consistent nutrition and water and I'm back to normal. :)
However, Friday night I was feeling kinda sinusy... So I took EXTRA care of myself... Did the nedi med, took Mucinex and Afrin (which is what my doc has said to do when I feel that way. I get a lot of sinus infections.). Early Saturday morning I woke up... sick. 

Most of the time when I think about food lately, its having to do with just wanting more... Just more rice. Or more sweet potato. More oatmeal with protein powder. By the way, oatmeal and cinnamon is sucking right now. I usually spend almost my whole workday saying one of two things (in my head, of course):
"Can I just go now?"
"Shit! I took so damn long to eat my last meal that its time to eat again."

I have only 3 days left of lifts... OMG I can't believe this is here! I have to admit that I have a little anxiety about my body. Not much, but I think this has to do with a couple of things... Firstly, I've never done a competition before. I don't know what judges are looking for at a local competition or if my physique will be anything like what they're looking for. I know I shouldn't be concerned with my placing, but you know what?! I'm someone who likes to do well at what I commit myself to, and I'm not ashamed of that. Second, I'm currently sick and a lot has to happen in the next week for the bloating to come off.

Abs seem like they take EVERYTHING I have to work them well, and since abs have been a focus during my offseason and prep, its important that I get it in until the very end! I'm so excited to do a few full body workouts next week just for something different. Cardio has been awesome. Running when I can and elliptical or bike when I can't run. However, I almost never have energy to run... I just set the treadmill at running speed and GO.

I had to have a conversation with Patrick about how life in our home will be this week... Especially since I'm sick...
Look, for the next 6 days...
-I will barely be doin laundry. I already don't separate whites from dark's and already use my washing machine as a laundry basket... But I will probably not be putting it away... Only taking what I need out of the dryer.
-I can't promise that I'll stop for every stop sign. Or do the speed limit, clearly.
-I also can't promise that I'll smell good. Or care.
-Bathroom breaks take precedence over any important conversation. Unless you want to clean up THAT mess.

I keep being told how awesome I look. And you know, for how shitty I feel right now... I had frickin better look awesome! ;)

Yeah so... we know that I'll be planning a wedding and stuff, but I'm also the kind of person that needs another goal. I don't want the blues, which I know will happen anyway, but I like goals and want one. I think I want to try to run a 10K.. And my question is, has anyone reading ever successfully gone from a contest diet to a runners diet? I'm sure my mind partially has to do with this anxiety about switching diets, but honestly the change will be semi-extreme if I was to go RIGHT into the runner's diet. So, I probably won't make the switch drastic or immediate... Because that would mean going from a very low carb, high protein diet straight into high carb. Anyway, like I said I'm sure its partially my mind playing with me... But I think we ALL know that going straight into high carb never works out well post-contest.

Special shout out to my amazing Momma! She took time out of her saturday to help me wax my back for me! Not like she's never seen all I got, but I still appreciate the kind of loyalty she gives! Love you Momma! You are the best mom for me. :)

Anyway, I'm on a mission to finish this one. I've only got 6 days. 6 workouts. And only have a 3 day work week... I can do anything for that amount of time. Its amazing that I've found the one and only time that my mind is genuinely stronger than my body. Boo! But at the same time, that is kind of encouraging. To know I am truly stronger on the inside, will give me power to make my body stronger as a whole.

Have a great week everyone! I promise to update as the week progresses! :) Peak Week is HERE!!!! HOLLA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

11 Days Out

2 weeks. Actually, 11 days. That's it. Every single day my body is changing and its absolutely unbelievable. I've always read girls' blogs, but never really knew for myself that this is true… But the biggest changes really do happen in the last few weeks. I've started taking progress pictures every other day, because that is really how much I notice it changing.

I've been without a cheat now for 4 weeks, which has been interesting. The more that time passes, the more I forget that I've been without. I only look forward… To pancakes, that is. :) I'm mostly on fish & egg whites, by choice sort of. The fish I've been told to. The egg whites really are because chicken has been giving me indigestion! I'm completely off of whey protein now, and was completely off casein at night on Saturday. Wahhh!!! ;( I started phasing off of it last week. Some part of me desperately is holding onto the "dessert before bed" thing, in which a chocolate casein shake is awesome! However, its time to let that go for a couple weeks. Last night, however, I have to admit that hot egg whites with hot sauce in bed... Was pretty awesome. That's probably because I'm fricking starving.

But let's talk about these pancakes a second...
I will be having, on contest day, gluten free pancakes with blueberries and a little sugar-free syrup. Along with some black coffee. Yes. 11 days to pancakes.

Cardio has been hard. I mean HARD hard. Doing the same amount I have been for a while, and only 60 mins a day, but it takes so much more energy to do it than it has in the past. New music, apps, & twitter keep me nice and distracted... But sometimes, even the best music can't gear you up for even the most minimal cardio session when you have absolutely no energy left. Calf cramps are completely gone now that I have incorporated Essential Electrolytes regularly into my supplement regimen.

If you have any kind of a cramp issue, and have never tried the EE's… they're AMAZING! EE's have changed my life. They really do help balance your electrolytes, and have no sugar so they can be taken throughout prep! No calf cramps, no middle of the night cramps, no side stitch.

Weights have been even harder. I mean, and I'm pretty little so my strength is just nuthin! I'm pushing and getting through it, but I'm also allowing myself the grace to be okay with 5 lb weights. Just as long as I'm getting it in! Luckily, a good friend Maggie has been working out with me on my hamstring/glute day which has been SO helpful. This is about the period of time where I genuinely don't mind when people want to talk, because the distraction helps me get through it without having to think about it. And the encouragement helps in a major way.

However, the changes make it all worth it. They keep me going! Quad separation is something I only day dreamed about before… And now its coming in. The abs, oh man, the abs. My abs come out more all the time, its amazing. Every day I get more and more excited. And not to sit here and pick myself apart, but I'm praying to the prep gods that my calves come down. Right now my calves are about as big as my thighs (or so it seems). Its literally the last place my body is holding fat. I genuinely don't think my calves are large, I think that's where my body wants to hold fat on top of well defined calf muscles. And when I pinch, the pinches are thick. Anyway, this is what keeps me on this diet. If I felt like I looked perfect, I might be tempted to cheat. However, I continue to work so hard just to ensure they come down… even if its down to the last day!

By the way, you know how I promised I wouldn't weigh until about 2 weeks out? Well, I didn't… Until about 2 weeks out… And I'm down to 105.0 lbs. So crazy! I've dropped 2.5 lbs in just the last 2 weeks, definitely the leanest I've EVER been at about 9% bf. I do love, also, that the fat has come off less in my face as it has in the past. I think keeping some fat in my face looks better, I don't want to look gaunt & skinny! I want to look healthy!

Contest Prep Realities.
More as the days go on, I have to remind myself that now isn't the time to pull out my baking stuff I've had in storage for the last 15 weeks. But I desperately want to bake. I miss baking. Baking was a therapy for me (so was eating the baked goods, but we won't go there). However, also more as the days go on, the less baked goods sound good to me. Butter & flour right now genuinely sounds like it will just make me ill. You know what I want right now?? A banana. Anything that I know would truly give me good burnable energy.
Also as the days go on, the less I am concerned with smelling or looking good. My make up is generally half-assed. My hair pretty much always looks slept on. I'm very fuzzy right now so I'm always working out in long shirts, which make me not smell so good when I sweat. Whatever. I bet I just wreak of fish & eggs when I'm on cardio.

Also also as the days go on, the more interesting life gets. I feel like I'm simply witnessing all these things happening while I only sit here and observe my own life. lol! Here... Let me give you an example...

I shit myself. Yeah, you read that right. And here are the realities of contest prep ladies, I eat so much protein for my small stature (250g+ per day) that I got so backed up, that one too many cups of coffee made it so I couldn't QUITE make it to the bathroom. In my defense, the closest restroom to my office is about a football field away. It wasn't noticeable to anyone else but myself, but still enough to have me want to change my pants. I decide to take my lunch to go home. I have 30 minutes to take exactly a 30 minute trip.

So I go home, change my pants, start a wash, kiss my dogs and get on my way.

Going just a tiny bit fast in order to get back to work on time, I pass a cop knowing that I'm going 5 over.. And figure he won't pull me over because its only 5 over. WRONG! I full-on (I'm not sure what a "Full-on" ticket is, but I got one) get a ticket for going only 5 over. I don't even try to fight him also in order to get back to work close to on time.

By the way, the whole time I'm over my meal timing requirements. I get back to work feeling like "I had better eat before I DIE."

In hindsight, I now wonder what the cop would have did if I had said to him when asked why I was going so fast:
"I was going so fast because I shit my pants, had to run home on my 30 minute lunch, and am going a tad fast in order to get back to work on time."
Patrick thinks I should have fought him some. Que Sera.

Another reality is how effing difficult it is to get about of bed about now... In order to make sure I do, this has been done:

Yeah, that happens every morning. Just to make sure.

In regards to stage stuff… wow, I have a whole lot coming. This weekend I got my hair done and am so excited! I haven't had my hair colored in MONTHS. I've also been tanning regularly just as a form of therapy to myself… So as to not reward myself with food. I hate to say that I'm not shaving anymore (UGH! I hate being fuzzy), as I'm getting my body waxing done this weekend and the bikini wax next week. My suit fits awesome, and I can't wait to show it to you guys! I've got my nail appointment set for the weds before my show… And I have nothing more to say other than I'm so excited! Excited, exhausted, depleted, short on patience, very short on energy and so so happy.

In other news..
Bang's Lawn Care is up and running! Patrick is going full force into this and is doing awesome! He has been able to help me do so much around the house since I've been way way too tired/busy to do much. I love that I have a partner that will willingly pick up the slack when needed. All women should have that.

Wedding plans are slow going, but I'm alright with that for now… I've got ALL summer to plan the wedding. However, we have scheduled our engagement photos for May 12th and am SO excited for that. The slow moving of the planning is kind of giving me time to decide more, think more, and just day dream. :) I'm sure you guys all know that since we live in the country, although we don't listen to country, we love country/rustic/romantic weddings. And that's exactly what I want… Relaxed, rustic, and romantic. And do it all with a BANG (pun intended. Hehe!) (In case people aren't getting that, my married last name truly will be Bang. Lacey Bang. LOL! It makes me laugh every time I read it.)!

Love you guys! Can't wait to share contest photos with you all! :)