Funny things happen as you get older. Most of them go unnoticed. However, this birthday I feel strangely aware of the fact that my body is getting older. I do not feel wiser nor do I feel older. But I am aware of it.
However aware I am is of no consequence. I suppose it is what I do with it, right?
Yesterday I had an old meal. Not old as in aged, but old as in a timeless meal that I once loved. It was something I could eat huge amounts of and never get sick or sick of it. It is my favorite chicken broccoli casserole that my mother made -major comfort food- jam packed full of calories, fat, TRANS fats, carbs, sugars, everything. Mayo, chicken, broccoli, cheese, and buttered bread crums.
I have been amazing in keeping to my meal plans so I decided to treat myself to this horribly amazing meal. I kept with a small portion, but honestly, that portion was enough. It was so rich, my body couldn't handle much (paired with the mimosas... yes, multiple mimosas). And it occurred to me while I was battling a stomach-ache afterward, that change is what I have to embrace. Although the casserole was something that I loved, its not something I'll always be able to handle.
Something that has been on my mind is the simple fact that cravings always get me. I don't always give into them, but I do have cravings. This casserole was a craving. The point, however, is that the craving may be what your mouth wants, but isn't always what your body needs. And my body had a pure reaction to how deliciously horrible it was.
I don't have to have cravings. And even when I'm craving something, I now don't feel like I have to have it after that birthday belly-ache.
And consequently, I got a beautiful angel for my birthday from my co-workers, with this written on her:
"Embrace change. Begin today, surround yourself with good people. Surrender your fear. Feel the brightness of being alive. What is calling you? Take flight toward your dreams. Wear red shoes. Believe in possibility. Be brave."
It is all so beautiful. I have experienced so much change in the last year. I should not fear and I should be brave to sacrificing to get to my goal... And will.