So, I have 9 days left of this madness, then cycling off my diet & so much cardio over the coming weeks. I have loved this process and am stoked to be in the best shape of my life and leaner than I have ever been. But I am ready for an off-season. I am ready to be my boyfriend's girlfriend. I am ready to make soup again every Sunday and bake whenever I felt like it. I am ready to have more time at home with my dogs and more time to give to my whole family in general. I am ready for some R&R (literally in every capacity).
But not yet. :)
This coming week will mark my 18th full week on Contest Prep and mark the 10th month I have been preparing to step on stage. I haven't loved every minute of it, I am ready for it to be over... BUT I am very thankful for it. I spent a solid 6 months building my back, shoulders & shaping everything. Then to have spent a long 18 weeks leaning out... I am beyond thankful. Contest Prep has put me into a pattern and I am embracing that, especially with my off-season plans.
Sunday brought a change. No more casein before bed. Wahhhh! We are trying to let my system flush out anything processed and therefore shed any of the water weight it causes. I had the option of doing any meat source I wanted, so I've decided to do egg whites before bed...
First attempt: Egg whites, cinnamon, a dropper full of vanilla stevia, sea salt. Was trying to go for the breakfast for dinner kind of thing... It was alright!
Second attempt: Egg whites, pumpkin pie spice, a dropper of stevia & sea salt. It was okay this time. I liked the flavor better, but towards the end of my dish... It seemed less than appealing.
Third attempt: Went with hot sauce because I was too tired to be creative.
On Wednesday, I was peeling egg whites off of hard boiled eggs (like I do..), and my co-worker asked if she could have one of my eggs (... she meant just the yokes)... I can tell you I almost lost it. I freaked out, turned bright red, started sweating as I tried to explain to her that I am just on the bare minimum of nutrition and need EVERYTHING to keep going. As she explained she just wanted my yokes, I felt my blood pressure go down. But seriously people, don't ask to have my food. I will give you an emphatic and loud "NO!"
(Okay, Wednesday I was hitting a new level of crazy)
THEN, I got my diet plan for Saturday thru Peak Week. SQUEEEEEEEE!!!! That was the light at the end of the tunnel that I needed. And what is on it for show day?? PANCAKES! I can't believe carb up time is ALMOST here!! But until then, I have noticed I am always hungry. ALWAYS. Again, I'm eating every 2-2.5 hours... but getting hunger anxiety around an hour (Before my family chimes in that I'm not being healthy, I am getting PLENTY of water, electrolytes, vitamins, minerals, and protein). I can do this... Only a few more days...
Monday I went into cardio with full force. I had some extra energy somehow and pumped it out like nothing. To the point where I left the gym before work excited to go back in the afternoon to show myself what I was made of!
Tuesday I was tired. Almost always to be expected after pushing really hard one day. Except this time, I want to feel like I've done everything I could. And its my last chance. I was exceedingly tired and somehow pushed thru a run around in the country surrounding our home. :) It was incredible. I just kept saying in my head, "F**k this, I can do it." I keep being told to conserve my energy and walk if need be, but if I have the energy or desire, why not? What is the worst that could happen? I lose energy and walk like I was supposed to? I was proud of myself and went to bed feeling like a goddess. Because having the opportunity to go home gave me extra time for laundry and to catch up around the house. :)
Wednesday I woke up extra tired as for some reason, and for as tired I was... I didn't sleep a wink. I considered going for a run in the middle of the night, but don't really want to be eaten by anything. I got up at 345 and made it to cardio.
Every day this week. There is no reason not to at this point. I might be tired etc, but it is necessary being this close. :) Fact, there were a couple days in there this week that I practiced before and after my PM workout session.
AND! On Tuesday, I got to pose in front of a lovely new friend, Stacy, who also uses my trainer for her nutrition! Thanks for being my guinea pig Stacy!! :) I am definitely trying to practice in front of new people, helps me take the edge off.
I do just want to say however, that I know that the point of this period of time is to squeeze every molecule of glycogen out of the muscles, but DAMN! I look super skinny. I look deflated and tired. I am very much looking forward to my rest day on Sunday and carbing up next week.
All my appts are booked like I've said, but now its just waiting for them to happen.
SO excited for a build. Like I mentioned last week, my body will be in prime condition for a build... I have been losing fat for so long (18 weeks, 12%, and 12 lbs later, maybe more before ...), my muscles are aching for something to hold onto. And I am going to give them just that! :) All of my off-season plans will be enclosed in a later post, but again... Just so excited to build in certain areas. I spent a good long time building before contest prep, and have much more experience this time around. But, I am looking at my physique as it is... and as I am very lean now... and seeing what muscles I want to improve... Its hard to wait when you want to work on something! Just like it was hard to wait for contest prep! ;)
But in all body-builder seriousness, that's kind of just what you do... You build, and then lean out... you build, and then lean out. Woot!
*Chelsea, I know exactly what you mean. My list of recipes is getting very long. VERY long. :)
Although I have a thousand things I need to bake, I am limiting myself. But this way it (whatever I make) does continue to be viewed as a treat, and not normalcy that I can have everyday. Except for Sunday right after my contest. Sunday, I am allowing myself to bake 4 items. And most of it will be taken to various people that deserve a treat for putting up with my crazy these last 10 months, in this order:
- Caramel Macchiato Cheesecake
- Hazelnut Chocolate Chip Scones
- Chocolate Chip Pecan Cookies
- Apple Crisp
*Wednesday night, I didn't sleep again. I had taken medication last night to help me sleep, and I don't remember waking up at all... But at some point, I realized that I was awake and thinking. I didn't get back to sleep. Sleep and I need to be very intimate friends tonight. I am very much a zombie today.
*Still hanging out at 108 lbs, but I don't expect this for long. My hot flashes have been acting up allllll week. And I think we all know what that means!!! :) (my metabolism is up, just in case I was wrong and you all don't know lol)
*New Prep Pet Peeve: Slow down on dirt roads if you see someone running! The dust is killing my lungs...
Oh my word I love you guys so much! You all are such a huge encouragement and I feel so flattered that you all think of me enough to say something every week! You all have made a huge difference in my prep and I thank each and every one of you!