50!

Hey! Somehow I have 50 people that like to read what I have to say :)

Sooooo, I got really sick, again... So I'm home nursing a fever and drinking Thera Flu trying to hold down my chicken. And although I absolutely detest being home sick... wanna see something cool?

This was me 2 years ago:

I don't even recognize this girl. Literally this was Spring 2009. I look knocked up, fat, and depressed.

Me now. Well, not now because I'm sick... but recently. ;)

I know I've told my story a lot, but revisiting those moments of where you used to be, makes you thankful for where you're at. If you haven't done that in a while, take a few minutes to think about what you've done (this isn't being a mom, because that was a gift... this is what you have done) that makes you proud.

So, I've been getting quite a few questions lately that I would love to answer. *ahem*

Since you've lost over 60 lbs, do you see yourself as skinny now or do you still see the fat?
Excellent question, for a long time I didn't see the changes. I think you develop a self-image after being large that takes a long time to dispel. With developing self-confidence and self-love, you begin to see yourself as you are. I feel like I'm in a position in my life at this point to see what is there. And let me tell you ladies who are working on your own weight loss, that there will always be faults. You will always see something that you "hate." But instead of thinking how much you hate it, try thinking about how you can change it. Even if you work on your butt for the rest of your life, its still a fight worth fighting! ;)

I do want to say, also, that I think others see me differently. And I get criticism, of course. Like the following:

• You don't have boobs big enough to be successful at competing. Touche. To be fair, however, my smallness is an insecurity I deal with. I work on loving myself all the time, no matter what I look like. Big OR small, stomach, butt, or boobs. I really don't dig the idea of surgery beyond what is medically necessary, but I think losing your size can make you feel less feminine and it has for me. I work on it.

 "I hear the criticism loud and clear, that is how I know that the time is near." -Nicki Minaj



Do you see food differently since you're eating such a strict diet? Are you afraid of fattening foods?

Nope! I'm still a foodie. I check out people's lunches and snacks, not because I'm judging but because it looks good. I never judge what people eat. Its their body. Gravy fries, maple bacon donuts, and hot dogs still always look and sound good to me. And I almost shove pumpkin bread up my nose daily. Mmm, food.

How do you deal with excess skin?
Before I say how I deal with this, I just want to say that this is a very real issue for a lot of women that seems to get worse as you age. And this is a great reason to START NOW. Don't wait until tomorrow to have the body you want, because as we get older our skin loses its elasticity.
So, first I tried Celtrixa... this is the product we see on tv all the time that is supposedly proven to reduce the appearance of stretch marks. I used this for a couple weeks and the smell wasn't pleasant... just smelled like medicine. And while I can say that this product probably lightened the color of the stretch marks, but I don't feel that this product reduced the overall appearance, which is what I was hoping for.
Currently, I use daily a product by Nourish called Skin Tight. This product came highly recommended on Livestrong.com as the number one product plastic surgeons recommend to patients prior to a procedure. I found this for $22.95 on SkinEnergizer.com (and don't tell anyone I said this, but I happened upon a discount code of SKIN which brought my purchase down to $7 haha). It comes in tons of different scents and I love it. It doesn't make your skin feel tight like you used harsh soap but my skin does feel more firm. :)

I really dig hearing from all of you! If you have any questions for me, please feel free to email or post! Also, if you read and I haven't heard from you, please say hi! :) I enjoy you all giving me things to speak my mind on. lol I'll give an update on my prep in a day or two. Hope you're having a lovely week friends!