This Isn't The Hard Part

Being on contest prep for the last 12 weeks, has already been a highly rewarding experience, already! I still have 6 more weeks to go, but I honestly feeeeellll like I may have, I'll say it quick, gonethruthehardpart...? I know its crazy, but I'll explain below. By the why, I also wanted to half apologize, but not really, for being extremely "documentary". This wasn't something I planned on my blog becoming but it just sort of has. I used to really like writing about things that inspired me, but I've found that living this lifestyle is inspiring me now. This whole process is really begin to feel exciting, also explained below.

Facts.
I can see my ab lines.
I'm leaner than I've ever been.
I have found a strength in myself that I've never seen before.
I've found friends in the body building world that support me in my goals.
I'm proud of myself for perservering.


BUT, I have a renewed strength and determination for a final push. 6 weeks isn't a ton of time, but I have it in me to prepare my body in 6 weeks. Hell! I lost 19 lbs in 6 weeks when I was overweight, I can lose a few more pounds of fat in these last 6!

Training: Training is going well, not much is changing as far as that goes except my own intensity. My cardio is more intense and I'm spending a lot more time running, as I feel that is what is going to take my athleticism to the next level. My treadmill HIIT workouts are a thing I didn't know I could handle before, I'm sprinting and sweating liters.

And this isn't something I've ever felt that I could do before. I've always been afraid of pushing too hard and hurting myself. But I've honestly not seen any problems with my back in months. I'm training on a level that I thought I couldn't do because I wasn't sure how easily I would burn out. And I'm not. :) I've found my spark that causes me to live my dream day in and day out. I think I'm in that surreal high of contest prep. I feel power, fatigue, hunger, burning, intensity, and life. I realize I'm being uber poetic, but I'm PMS'ing and hormonal. But I'm also more proud of myself right now than I have ever been, and more sure of myself than I have ever been. And I'm embracing that.

Diet: Doing great this week! Still off sweeteners, which my stomach feels 100x better than it did... the crampies came back at the beginning of the week (probably due to the sugar & sweeteners on Sunday) during my cardio. It lessened a LOT by Wednesday morning. I was tempted for some coffee this morning, but that feeling that the sweeteners gives isn't worth it. That feeling is awful!
And I have to SMACK thank Nicole Wilkins-Lee for posting the information about spray butter. UGH! And once you know something, you can't un-know it. So, spray butter is now out... but I'm still on high sodium so its just more added salt to food. I just couldn't justify continuing to consume it at this point in my prep, it was kind of a decision that looked a lot like: "It could be the difference between failure and having my dreams." Done deal.
Still eating a LOT more fish than I was used to. And by a lot I mean, 4-5 nights a week. The texture is now getting easier to handle, which I think came with figuring out how to cook it correctly.

Misc: Hot flashes are back! Again getting crazy hot flashes in the middle of the day, which I am now taking to mean my metabolism is up and hard at work!
I'm drinking a TON of water. And not because I've been required to but I've been one thirsty girl!
I'm not missing as much this week. Missing, as in coffee or sweets and stuff. I think Sunday snapped me right out of my half-commitment to this and has caused me to realize that... This is my dream. I want to hold my pro-card (spoiler alert: maybe in a different division?) someday. I've stared at the women in M&F Hers and coveted what they had: not just a body (but also that...), but a fire about them that says without words, "I am an athlete. I work hard for what I have. And I'm confident because I accomplish everything I want." Yeah. Want that.

Also, facts. But random ones.
My house gets neglected when I'm tired. My OCD-self somehow subsides. (also a good thing?)
My house also gets efficient, I no longer bother with sorting clothes in the wash. Neither of us wear red, so no harm done.
Not everyone is supportive in your goals. In my case, this is due to not always having the time to spend with everyone I want to, or that wants to spend time with me.
TOM is scheduled for the week before Peak Week. Looking forward to that adventure.
I keep wondering if I'm going to have to go to 3 a days cardio. Part of me wants that though, just for an excuse to run my fat pup/dog (he's 7 months and 160 lbs... Pretty sure that is only going to get worse...)

I wish I were kidding. He's only 7 months.

Logistics: I was successful in undoing my Hiccup from Sunday. Friday morning I weighed in at 111.5 lbs. By Wednesday I had back almost all of my definition. By Thursday I felt I had it all back and then some! Right now I'm noticing some of the definition in my legs coming out (eeee!) and my pants aren't fitting AT ALL anymore. My size 4 pants, sadly are baggy. I can completely remove them without unbuttoning or unzipping. Yikes! I must be losing in the booty/hips area right now! Can I get a WOOT WOOT for TONS of new clothes from a yard sale?! Check it:

6 Week Check-in:  Went great, it was short and sweet because Jacques was satisfied with my progress. We discussed my Hiccup and what it actually did for me mentally. We also began to discuss my off season, which I'm feeling really excited about (I might discuss later, if people really want to know). We also mentioned that I am marking my last cheat meal tonight. Which is yogurt and a piece of fruit. Yay! But I'm also excited to be pressed into a long period of time with no cheats. I'm excited to see what my body does with the amount of drive I'm feeling at this point.
PS-Lisa @ Lisa's Fit World & JR @ Undercover Pro: For some reason, your blogs are now blocked where I tend to read them :) for adult content. I love you both and promise I'm not ignoring you!!! I will try to get caught up on your blogs on the weekend!

Have a lovely week everyone! While I may not comment on everyones' blogs, I do read all of them. :) I promise to update you with progress pics next week!